PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: Oh, it’s gonna be quite a circus if all these appointments go through.

UNICORN: But Tom Daschle?

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: I think, I think the list of names — Hillary Clinton, she’s the most hawkish out of all of them. But this isn’t just keep your friends close and your enemies closer, Unicorn. This is keep your friends close and your enemies under your thumb.

UNICORN: I see.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: By selecting these Clintonistas, he’s putting a down payment on an eight-year term –

UNICORN: I see.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: — and I don’t think Hillary wants it.

UNICORN: All right, so — I see.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: If I were Hillary, I wouldn’t want to be under Barack Obama’s thumb. Would you?

UNICORN: All right. You know, it’s, you know, the guy — he can do nothing right in the eyes of some conservatives, right Patsy the Dark Elf? I mean, there’s nothing he can do. No matter who he would pick, they’d find a reason, “Oh, my God, look what he’s doing.” Either they have no experience, or they have experience, and they criticize either way.

PATSY THE DARK ELF: Well, that’s exactly right. I think he’s picked absolutely amazing people. I mean, Tom Daschle has experience as a former Senate majority leader, and what I really think is it signals how important health care is to the Obama administration, and how they really want to help insure the 47 million Americans who –

UNICORN: Right.

PATSY THE DARK ELF: — don’t have health insurance.

UNICORN: Patsy the Blood Elf, has he picked one person — one good person yet? One? Can you name one good thing he’s done?

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: Mmmm…

GOBLIN: I can!

UNICORN: One good thing? No, no, no, I’m talking to Patsy the Dark Elf.

GOBLIN I got an answer!

UNICORN: You know, whenever I ask a guest a question, the Goblin loves to answer me. Patsy the Dark Elf, name one good thing Obama’s done.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: I’m Patsy the Blood Elf.

UNICORN: I mean Patsy the Blood Elf. I know.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: You’re confusing us.

UNICORN: I’m just so confused.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: How can you confuse us, Unicorn?

GOBLIN I got an answer!

UNICORN: I know. Go ahead. Name one good thing he’s done.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: No, if he –

GOBLIN I have the answer!

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: — if he selects Hillary Clinton, even though for them to select Hillary Clinton and Bill, it would be akin to a family adopting –

UNICORN: Name one good thing he’s done.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: akin to –

UNICORN: That’s all I’m asking.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: Hold on, hold on, hold on.

UNICORN: I’m asking. You’re not answering my question.

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: It would be akin to a family adopting the Menendez brothers –

UNICORN: Can you name one good thing he’s done?

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: — if they took them on.

PATSY THE DARK ELF: Now, but wait a minute, Patsy the Blood Elf –

PATSY THE BLOOD ELF: If he names Hillary, I think she’d be a better pick than the rest of the names on that list.

UNICORN: I see.

On Fox, Tantaros said Obama nominating Clinton as sec. of state “would be akin to a family adopting the Menendez brothers”

Farewell, passive little Unicorn